That's Not My Name
I’m sorry! I didn’t catch your name!
The
year was 1987 and our beloved Denise Huxtable was embarking on her sophomore
year at Hillman College (Her parent’s alma mater). The season opens with Denise
requesting a room change from the newly divorced, a little seasoned, meticulous,
freshmen roommate, Jaleesa Vinson and Maggie, one of the few Caucasian students
on Hillman’s campus.
Though we find out later that
college wasn’t the move for Denise; we get the opportunity to watch Jaleesa
grow, excel in her academics, get married, and have a child. Maybe my mother
knew what she was doing by naming me after the fictional character. I often
laugh because we are so much alike (she can have the divorce part though).
Check out the full Cosby spinoff on Netflix J
However, this Jaleesa has not always
been “proud” of her name. Father (Jimmie) + Mother (Lisa)= Jalisa. After seeing
the spelling of the Different World character my name went from Jalisa to
Jaleesa. I felt like people would stereotype me because of my name. I have
introduced myself and have been met with, “Ohhhh, that’s different” or my
favorite, “It’s uuummmm ethnic”. One lady said, “You must have to repeat
yourself all the time”. I considered going by J.R. Smith for a long time. You
wouldn’t know if I were black, white, male, or female. I had never seen a successful
Jaleesa before.
I
didn’t want to be counted out before I even started! Then I came to my senses.
Jaleesa has the Career Studies Certificate, Bachelors, Masters, and soon PH.D.
Jaleesa is the blogger, dancer, leader, and speaker. Jaleesa is the mentor,
daughter, and friend. If someone decides my name is too ethnic for their
roster, they don’t deserve me…. good thing I work for myself ;-)
My
friend Chatocwa McWhorter went through the same thing. It wasn’t until she put
Ms. McWhorter on her application that she got callbacks. Let me share a part of
her impressive resume’. This young, beautiful, black sista graduated Magna Cum
Laude from Fordham University and holds a Juris Doctorate from Liberty
University (yes, she’s a lawyer). Served as an Assistant Public Defender, Program
Manager, and Legal Intern but was skipped over, not because of her work, but
her name.
What
do we share with the next generations of LaQuanna’s, Jaquisha’s, Shaniqua’s,
and JaKiesha’s? Just do you baby. Prove the doubters wrong and don’t let your
name or the lack of understanding of your name keep you from greatness. Maybe
your name is not ghetto but just not traditional. Remember this: The world’s
greatest entertainer’s name is Beyonce’, Your current President: Barack, One of
the most successful women: Oprah. 66th Secretary of State:
Condoleezza. And the blog you’re reading: Coach Jaleesa Roche’…you’re in good
company.
Media and the Black Woman
Being
Mary Jane, Scandal, How to Get Away With Murder, Housewives of Atlanta, Love
and Hip Hop…what do they have in common? Black shows…female leads. What’s my
issue? The way we are depicted. Yes, Olivia is gladiator and she wears her
white hat (by the way, I stopped watching Scandal seasons ago so none of my
references will be new). But as beautiful, fashionable, and smart as Olivia is why
does she have to be a part of an affair with a married man. Beautiful,
accomplished and a home wrecker…
As
“rich and successful” as Kandi, Nene, Cynthia, and Kenya are why do they
slander, fight, and gossip. Beautiful, successful, and messy.
Mary Jane Paul,
Beautiful, Successful, and all of the above.
Where
are the Claire Huxtable’s, the Tia and Tamera Mowry’s, the Harriett Winslow’s,
Moesha’s and Florida Evans’. We have settled for the image that media has given
us. We get mad when people clump us together as ignorant, loud mouthed, neck
snapping, angry women yet we support the very things that portray us that way.
Anywayyyyyyy,
I’m going to save the natural hair talk for another day because after talking
to a few people they thought I should do a poll first. So I’m signing off for
now *starts singing, India Arie’s “I Am Not My Hair” *. Shout out to all my
Ethnic name girls who’s first syllable is La, who may have a “Qui” somewhere in
there, or who has unnecessary silent letters…be great boo, you are the real MVP!
Lol
Questions,
Concerns, Comments: Email coachjaleesa@gmail.com.
Use subject: That’s Not My Name or comment below. See you next week.
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